Randoms stuff in my head

1. I'm kind of disappointed that I haven't heard a word from the step dad over the last few months. I didn't really blog about it in detail, and I still might, but basically he has had a really hard time dealing with my mom's passing. In a nut shell, he isn't dealing with his grief at all and it turned him into someone I didn't know and I was the unfair target of his anger. It kind of came to a head this summer, well, and I haven't heard from him since August. I thought maybe my birthday he would reach out...nada. Thought maybe Christmas.....nada. Oh well, I just pray that he is getting the help he needs and live my life the best that I can.

Oh and FYI, yes, I've tried over and over since she passed to maintain the relationship only to get burned over and over so after long talks and some insight from my grief counselor it was suggested that for my own progress I needed to step back until he's able to get help or get past his anger.

2. Still waiting on my condo. I knew it was going to be a wait and I'm doing OK with that... but of course I'm getting ants in my pants. Last night I found myself browsing the isles of Big Box Home Improvement Store just to get ideas and see how much some things would cost to upgrade & replace. It was AWESOME! I'm thinking I may have to ditch the whole accounting thing and become a contractor. We shall see how I feel about that when I actually have my own home to maintain.

3. The guy situation.  He really seems to be trying to win me back, even from afar. Last week I got a super exciting gift from him. This gift may just involve me spending this coming Saturday at an amazing day spa up the the mountains. This general location also happens to be one of "our" spots.... one of our fist dates, return visits for romantic getaways and hikes in the woods. I am so looking forward to the day of pampering I can hardly stand myself. He sure knows the way to this woman's heart is thru the spa! lol. I'm only 1/2 kidding, I know there is more to this than being wooed by amazing thoughtful gifts from 1/2 around the world.... but I'm sure not going to turn it down.

4. The Mrs just sent out her Valentine Swap partners and I'm really excited. I participated in her Christmas swap and it was a lot of fun. To me, it's so interesting to see what someone you only "know" thru a blog come up.

5. I have some good stuff to look forward to. My most awesome bestest cutest funnies Granny is turning 90 next month! Sheesh that's old! I'll be heading over to the other side of the state to celebrate with her and the rest of the fam. I'm about due for another dose of good family time. You know, those people that totally get my sarcasm (because they are the cause of it!), know my history and where I'm coming from. Dysfunctional as we can be, these people have got my back and I love them.

6. I love Skype.

7. I have written about my fitness goals for awhile. That’s because I had some bumps in the road, lost ½ of my previous progress, two months of maintaining only over the holidays (but good god, with all the cookies I ate it’s a miracle that I managed to offset that with the exercise), but this last week I finally put my heart and soul into it and I made progress!! Lost 2.8lbs but better than that my measurements changed and I’m back to the same lean muscle mass that I was in August and within half a pound of being at that same weight again too. I don’t have a lot to lose, but round about 12 lbs to get to my comfortable weight and a size where I’m fitting into all my clothes again. *whew*


Bring it on 2010. I feel in a generally good mental state to tackle some of the challenges I know I have coming up…. I’m prepared. I will prevail. I will be living the best life that I can.