Lets Play a Game!!!!
Can you find the subject of this picture?
No, it's not the lonely little chocolate milk lost in the sea of soda and milk....
Hmmmm, the two ladies aren't wearing their underwear as outerwear, PJs, disco costume, or clown wig and all their body parts are safely tucked in where they should be....
And not a Cousin Eddy in sight (at least not in the picture)...
If you haven't already, take a look.
Hell, submit a few of your own and then let me know so I can feel some sort of personal connection to the sites.
Awkward Family Photos
Sketchy Santas
People of Walmart
It is a pretty well known part of my personality. I.am.not.a.morning.person. I hate being scared out of sleep by an alarm clock. I do not pop out of bed ready to tackle the world. I'm slow. I hit snooze more than 2 times. I'm groggy and take a long time to really be awake and functioning.
I laugh now but I'm sure you can imagine the bone of contention this was while in my relationship with a career army, former Drill Sgt, I'm-a-machine-need-little-sleep man. I bring this up now because the reaction when he heard that I'm now faithfully getting up at 5:30 for my cat was priceless.
Anyway, I now have a loved pet that is diabetic and needs an insulin shot at 6am. This has me waking up at 5:30, a good hour and a half earlier than I need to get up for work. *sigh* ::grumble:: *yawn* Yes, I'm worried that one morning I'm going to give the wrong dose, stab my cat somewhere that I shouldn't, stab myself, put the insulin in the freezer instead of the fridge... basically something bad.
When this started two weeks ago and about two days in I realized that trying to go back to sleep for an hour wasn't going to happen, I swore that I was going to make it productive time.
The big plan was to stay up and do one of the core workouts that I can get via On Demand Fitness TV. Still taking baby steps but today I was productive! I put away the dishes, I did 5 minutes of a 20 minute video (I said baby steps), I browsed some other video possibilities, read emails, did some more feline diabetes research and watched some news.
Here is the big one... get this. Yesterday, I actually jumped at the chance to take a 6:50 mammogram appointment. WTF is that all about? I kind of got off on it too. The lady says "Oh we can get you in on Friday but it's a 6:50. "I'll take it! Perfect" I had to kind of look around the room & check over my shoulder to see who it was that just responded. Dude, I'm getting my boobs mashed between glass prior to 7am on Friday. *blink* *blink* That will be a whole 'nuther post because I do intend to share. Friends have already asked me to take lots of mental notes and share because none of them are at an age or circumstance that getting a mammo before age 40 is really going to happen.
Oh, and side note. After some months of blogging, I've kind of felt how I want to settle into this so working on a new layout and title etc. I love playing around with the HTML stuff so that will be fun.
Later!
Who sits and massages their girl's feet during a movie in a crowded PUBLIC movie theater?
As if it wasn't bad enough that before she even pushed past us in the aisle she dropped her gallon soda on the floor, cussed and then just left the lake-o-coke with not even the consideration of informing someone that could clean it up.
What is that strange noise I hear? No... it can't be. Those are not feet on a lap being massaged and just a couple of inches from my elbow.
On the couch at home; sweet and adorable. In a public theater; keep your complete stranger nasty azz feet to yourself.
Here is the funny part. For whatever reason I would have been less offended if they had been messing around a little than I was by her feet right there next to me.
I had one of those weekends were I noticed all over the place how completely inconsiderate folks can be. And we wonder why kids act that way with these shining examples.
Well not really.
Just as I predicted (of course didn't say it out loud incase I was wrong) I heard from the Ex over the weekend. I was expecting to hear from him sometime between finishing his last training class and leaving for overseas. I didn't expect the call to come so quickly.
I knew at some point (just as I was getting use to the idea of not having conversations with him) I'd hear from him. I knew he wouldn't leave without testing the waters to see if I'm considered "a friend" and if he still has some sort of connection with me.
All along I told myself that I wouldn't answer when he called. *I've heard that before*
I was out at the driving range on a beautiful Sunday morning swinging away and the phone rang. I took a look. I could have ignored the call. I didn't. *again, doesn't this sound familiar* Talking to me like normal, like the last conversation we had wasn't in an airport with me crying my eyes out as we said goodbye, the final goodbye to our relationship and the final goodbye before he leaves overseas.
I didn't have to answer... but I couldn't help it. I think I was afraid of how I'd feel if I didn't talk to him again or cut off our communication before he deploys.
One phone call and here I go all over again trying to let go.
My freakin shots went to shit too.
These two headlines today make my vajayjay nervous:
"Whoa, baby! Woman delivers 19lb baby boy"
"Woman gets pregnant twice...not twins"
And this one? Nice, I guess in the land of Starbucks coffee pimps were to be expected? Let me not even get started on the coffee stand down the street that advertises bikini baristas as "sexy young girls" "how may we serve you" and "cream with your coffee?":
"Bikini baristas accused of prostitution"
Are you surprised?
I am loud and proud about my love of my Snuggie ( just in case you missed it) ... but NO, this is not my pet and I wouldn't go this far.
But are you surprised that someone has?
Photo courtsey of Allstar Products the maker of this little gem.
Sitting here on a beautiful sunny Friday afternoon with less than one hour to go before quitin' time.
*bzzzzz* goes the cell phone
A new text message. FROM THE EX.
he: Whatcha doin?
*blink blink*
*blink blink*
I look around like the candid camera is going to jump out from around the corner.
me: I think you sent this it the wong person
Because really, "whatcha doin?" in a text message to the woman that you didn't have the decency to have any further discussion or parting conversation with after you broke up with her is really the nice casual tone to take if for some reason you feel the need to get in contact with her again?
he: Really?
me: So you meant to send that to me.... S?
he: Absolutely!
me: That is very random
he: So my question....whatcha doin?
Again...really? whatcha doin? And my dumb ass answers. I have so little self control sometimes.
me: working
he: I miss you much!
*crack* *phone leaping out of hand and flying to the desk surface like it was on fire*
*blink blink* staring at said on fire phone as it sits face up on my desk with those words trying to burn my eyeballs.
I'm still staring at it. I don't know what to do. I know what I should do. I should just let that hang there because REALLY? I'm kind of pissed off. I'm a lot pissed off. I'm going to let those words hang there. I'm going to let him feel like I felt when he asked me to call him back and he never answered...and never called me back.
At least that is what I will do for as long as I can while hoping that I don't break down and says someth...
Crap.
It just *bzzzzz* again. (yes, this is a real time blog writing)
he: Ooohkay.... when is your graduation?
Ok, come on guys...you can come out now. Ha ha... very funny... make S think she is in the Twilight Zone rather than sitting at her desk waiting for 5pm. You can come out now...and who ever set this up, really, I won't be mad...
I've got to go powder my nose and gloss real quick before the camera crew reveals itself.
To be continued......
I love shoes.
No. I love CUTE shoes.
I couple of years ago my BFF and I found what at the time were the ugliest shoes in the world. Since then, we relish in sharing new even uglier discoveries. So I shall share with you my latest discovery.
May I introduce you to the summer boot thong. (Does a peg really classify it as a thong?) Possible practical use as ankle brace protector.
And for those occasions when your summer booth thong requires a little bit of fancy.... it comes in *ta da* gold!
First an foremost TGImuthafreainF! Amazingly enough, we're scheduled for sunshine this weekend and I can't wait to get out with the other bazillion locals who flock to the outdoors to catch some elusive rays on weekends like this.
I also start working with a personal trainer on Sunday. I've fallen off the wagon a bit and need a jump start before summer. If I'm paying and have to meet someone I won't come up with excuses. I'm considering taking before and after photos, but I'm scared of looking at the before!
On to my public service announcement.....
I'm not totally unaware that there are guidelines like this, but just like those nasty "what gross stuff is really in your hotel room" articles I'm left staring at the screen with big blinking eyeballs. O____O
Excertp from this article, "13 Secrets the Food Industry Doesn't Want You to Know" http://health.msn.com/nutrition/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100238557&Gt1=31036
Secret No. 3: The maggot allowance
Food companies don’t want you to know that your food can legally contain maggots. Sure, the FDA limits the amount of these and other appetite killers in your food, that but limit isn’t zero. The following allowances aren’t harmful to your health—but we can’t promise that the thought of them won’t make you sick.
Food............................Can contain up to
Canned Pineapples....20% positive mold tests
Canned Tomatoes......5 fly eggs and 1 maggot per 500 grams
Frozen Broccoli...........60 mites per 100 grams
Ground Cinnamon......400 insect fragments and 11 rodent hairs per 50 grams
Peanut Butter.............30 insect fragments and 1 rodent hair per 100 grams
Popcorn........................20 gnawed grains or 2 rodent hairs per pound
Potato Chips................6% rotten chips
Really?
Seriously?
