Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Phase 1.5

"Fake it till ya make it" just isn't cutting it anymore. 

It was one month ago yesterday that I found out my man was a fake, fraud, phony, narcissist. Yes, I said it.  He was more that just a selfish asshole.  Pray that you never encounter one outside of reading a case study.

It was one month ago today that I walked away from him at the airport knowing it would be the last time I would see him. The last time I would tell him goodbye.

Today is the day to start something new.

No more giving myself permission to make choices that aren't healthy for me "because you deserve to take a break".  No more justifying sitting on the couch eating pizza.  Done.  No more justifying self medicating so I don't have to feel.  Done.  No more unhealthy self destructive behavior.  Done.

It's all about getting back into my good routines that make me happy rather than down on myself when I already have reason enough to feel a bit down as it is.

Things around this joint will only get out of control if I let them.  Uh, and my inner control freak sure as heck isn't going to let that happen.  If there is one thing in this world I can control it's ME!

Oh, gotta go... doorbell, my last pizza is here.  I'm typing this to post tomorrow. Nobody's perfect.


T said...

You go girl. You got this. Allow yourself to feel like crap but yes, then put on your big girl panties! You'll still have moments of sadness and hey, that's ok.

Big kudos and hugs to you!

Danielle said...

You gave yourself some time. I agree with that, but yes, it is time to get back to "YOU". Don't let him have anymore control over you. You are a good women!